abstinence class (short fiction)

They made us suck jolly ranchers, spit them into a bag we passed around the room, and after the bag was full, they dared us to eat a random one. Job (yes the biblical name pronunciation) went to to these horrified Christian College students and dumped all the wet candy into his mouth.

Our teacher about fainted. I felt a little queasiness overcome that lovely green apple taste in my mouth. Job shrugged and he said “I’ve kissed everybody in here!”

The girl christian tried to reclaim the narrative. “That’s true by the transitive property. If you’ve kissed a girl and she’s kissed a boy, well…”

Job looked at her over his shoulder. He sounded like someone’s dad talking around chewing tobacco. “I have kissed every single person in this room. “

I’ve had a thing for bi/pan guys ever since.


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